Encoded into our DNA is the desire to be right. And oh, how we hold onto positions or dreams or relationships or jobs—even when we know they’re wrong.
And the more we bolster up a false truth, the longer before we accept reality.
Denial of the real truth always comes from a hidden fear nestled deeply within the breast. The ego thinks that stuffing it keeps us safe. He doesn’t really drink that much, does he? My job isn’t that bad. I’m too old to pursue my dream of _____.
And staying safe causes one to keep from trying. Whatever the trying is about. Funny, too, so often, that fear couches itself in colorful clothing, calling itself wisdom, experience, analysis—anything to mask the underlying fear, stopping you in your tracks.
You don’t have to get too far in this life to have had enough failure that it can, indeed, seem wise not to grasp for that brass ring, not to focus on a goal where the path is fraught with potholes and demons. You’ve been bit before, no? Stumbled perhaps. Fallen down.
So why should you trot down a road where that’s sure to happen again? What fool would keep taking chances, especially to achieve something long ahead and far away?
Indeed, to continue to do the same thing over and over, hoping for different results, is surely insanity. But that’s not what I’m talking about. I’m talking about that voice that tells you not to try for something new, because you’ve fallen in the past. The one that keeps you safe and warm and cozy—and not achieving to your highest level.
And once you’re in that place, listening to the safety voice, overcoming fear may seem the least of your worries. That voice is saying it’s not fear, right? It’s hammering on you about how wise you are not to do the thing you desire.
It flattens out your life. Which after a trauma of any sort isn’t a bad thing. It only boxes you when you stay there. As Author Anais Nin said, “Life is a process of becoming, a combination of states we have to go through. Where people fail is that they wish to elect a state and remain in it. This is a kind of death.”
Once you dissect that fearful voice, hear it for who it really is, then you have a choice. Stay where you are, full well knowing you’ve stopped your growth, or buck up, pull your bootstraps to where they need to be, put on those big-girl panties, and try.
We can analyze and argue with ourselves till the cows return to the barn, but that’s not going to get you where you want to go—on that path to your destiny, which awaits as a shining beacon in the sun.
And we all have a destiny—we all have something to which the Creator put us here to do. Sadly, that’s rarely easy! LOL. Our best successes, our best achievements of goals and dreams always comes with a price. But far, far more expensive to not pursue . . .
In the end only one action serves in overcoming fear. Only one real way to slay that demon and move forward. After all the analysis and arguing and planning, only one thing remains for you to do.
Just do it. Take the leap. Know in your heart of hearts that even if you’re wrong, the trying itself brings a boon that you could never foresee. This I know for true—one never takes on a worthwhile endeavor without learning from it, growing, becoming enriched by the process itself.
And that’s worst-case scenario! In the end, you just might reach your goal.
As Author John W. Gardner said, “We pay a heavy price for our fear of failure. It is a powerful obstacle to growth. It assures the progressive narrowing of the personality and prevents exploration and experimentation. There is no learning without some difficulty and fumbling. If you want to keep on learning, you must keep on risking failure — all your life. It’s as simple as that.” –Self-Renewal: The Individual and the Innovative Society.